Surprise: I'm in Biloxi, MS!

I am writing to you from the road! Currently headed to Biloxi, MS and about an hour away from the RV campground. The past 20 hours have been interesting, tiring, smelly, sunny, and awesome! Speaking of sunny, the sun has been out all day while we've been on the road. This was much needed after a long drive in the rain last night! This trip was unplanned and random! You may ask how I ended up on the road! Well, I'll tell you.

House Update! I had my home inspection, agreed to make specific repairs, signed a contract, made the repairs, and then had to make more repairs! The lender and appraiser required the crawl space of the home to be cleaned...the crawl space. It is the length of the home and had dirt, bricks, pipes and construction material in it due to construction decades ago. The loan is FHA and according to the lender this HAD to be clean. I'm not going to go into emotional detail about this because I have already dedicated to much time to my negative thoughts on this event. Two men and three days later the crawl space is clean. Don't forget it rained (heavy) for two days straight so now there is a layer of water in the cellar so I have to also pay to have two fans run for two days to dry the floor before the appraiser shows up. That would only cost me more money. No matter that the home is 100 years old and it is a cellar. No emotion! No emotion! 

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Warning: This may get dramatic

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Friday morning I checked my email and found my bill from the contractor. The work on the crawl space cost me another $1,500. No big deal. Needless to say I struggled to understand why this had to be done in the first place and how it could be that expensive. But, that is life. I dwelled for hours on this event and I let it ruin my morning. I couldn't get out of my own head and get rid of the anger and disappointment. This is something I am going to work on. I can control how I react to the things that happen around me and I am not going to dwell on the negative or 'what could've' happened. It took a friend to shake me out of my negative self loathing morning on Friday. It was so simple. They just said, 'Well, let's just go somewhere already!' Duh! What did I have to do? Other than stay in my (almost) empty dusty house and dwell on how much money it was costing me to sell it. As we have drove the past night and day I have recognized that Fear is what was holding me back from jumping in the RV and starting to travel. 

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Fear of the present. Fear of the choice I have made. Fear of my journey. Fear to leave my past. 

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The past 4 months I have planned, budgeted, researched, and discussed this journey. But, I had not started it. I was afraid to walk the walk. The past week my head has been full of doubt and fear. What am I doing? I should just go back to Amazon, keep my head down, stay in the house, and in my comfort zone. What if I fail? This is stupid. Who travels by themselves? Who quits their job? Money is just flying out of my hands. Everything is going wrong with the house, it's a sign. Ahhhhhhhhh I could go on but I think you get the point. Well, I didn't do any of those things! I sucked it up, said bye-bye to those thoughts for a few hours, packed up the dogs, and got in the RV with my friend.  Our journey started at 7:30 PM on Friday. And we are still driving...insert crying laughing face here. Below are a quick list of things that have happened. Enjoy...

• Spent $175 on gas.
• Drove 7 hours in the pouring rain.
• Begged Charlie to pee and poop outside 3 different times.
• Walked the dogs 5 times.
• Begged Charlie to lay down and go to sleep
• Got a migraine and almost threw up, had to go in Walmart for Excedrin and Caffeine. 
• Charlie finally peed, pooped, and slept at 4:00 AM
• Laid in bed for an hour and begged my brain to fall asleep. 
• Slept 5 hours in a Walmart parking lot. 
• Ate cheese chunks, trail mix, grapes, cold chicken shreds, water out of a jug, and coffee.
• Drank coffee under the awning while it dried off in the Wal-mart parking lot. 
• Chibi slept for 13 hours on and off...(lucky)
• Emptied the Gray and Black tank for the first time. 
• Booked a RV spot in Biloxi for the night.
• Drove 6 hours in the beautiful sunshine
• Laughed, sang, smiled at the dogs, smiled that Charlie finally relaxed and fell asleep in her bed. 
• At that's not even all yet! 

Listen, we do smell, we are tired, our hair is crazy, the dogs are exhausted! BUT, we have traveled through 4 states, stopped when we wanted, drove when we wanted, talked when we wanted, and we still have a couple days to go. I feel free! I feel crazy! I feel anxious! I feel proud! I feel excited! I am so excited to see what else our first trip has in store for us!

I am the luckiest girl alive. 

At least on I-65 ;)

Cara Ostara*